Benevolence… a worthy attainment

I’ve been watching a lot of documentaries lately on inspirational people. From Martin Luther King Jr. to Gandhi and Bob Marley. The thing that was so inspiring about all of these people was their capacity to give. It was their capacity to Love and believe in something greater than themselves. It was to do something good and selflessly sacrifice, with the only reward of knowledge that what they were doing was right. But it is said that the only way to be happy is to give.

Everyone knows by his music that Bob Marley was politically and socially conscious, but I’m not sure that everyone knows just how much he gave of himself for the good of his country and for the good of human kind in general. I never knew just how much he gave. Not only did he give benefit concerts and speak out on injustice and on his belief in unity, but he kept the doors open to his home and put his life in danger multiple times for the sake of his work and what he considered his purpose. If everyone did their part and opened their hearts and minds even a fraction of that, imagine where we would actually be? Seeing someone be so selfless in such a way, you wonder what it is that you can do in this time and place, to do your part.

Anyone who has ever inspired a great movement was one who gave so much of themselves that they inspire others to give. But I’ve wondered many times as to the strength in my own beliefs and as to what I would give to uphold those beliefs. If I lived in 1963 would I have marched with Dr. King? If I was in Bob’s shoes, would I have still went up on stage after being shot, knowing there was a possibility that I could be killed on stage? But I do not live in 1963 and I am not Bob Marley. I am me and I live in Brooklyn in 2013. As of now, I see positivity as my only weapon. My words and my mind are my strengths.

Currently, I am looking for a volunteer opportunity to work with children and I wonder if it will hinder me with all of the goals I’ve set forth for myself. But what is a few hours out of the week to do something that benefits someone less fortunate/ experienced/ knowledgable? My good friend, Randy Griffiths is a successful trainer in the NYC metro area and owner of BBR (Body By Randy) Fitness. He works incessantly, yet he donates his time and expertise once a week (9am, Saturday morning at the East River Park on East 6th St. and FDR Drive) to run a bootcamp. He only accepts donations for this hour of training, because whatever is donated over the span of the bootcamp is put towards “Pencils for Kids,” an educational foundation aided for benefit kids in Jamaica. It’s his way of giving back. It’s a way for him to allow participants to do good for others, with the added incentive of doing something good for themselves and their health. It’s genius and selfless and inspirational.

What is it that you do that is selfless? Is benevolence a virtue you strive to attain? Is knowing someone benefitted from your gesture enough payment? Is karma enough? Would you keep it simple, or start a movement? There are so much going on in the world. How are you going to “give back?”

I’ve recorded a cover of Bob Marley’s “Redemption Song,” for this post because I believe that every day is another day to redeem ourselves for anything that we lacked before. We can start today with releasing instilled negativity (racism, bigotry, greed, sexism, etc.) and accepting and projecting positivity into the world. Each generation has an opportunity to continue to build from the previous generation’s good deeds. Every generation has an opportunity to rethink the bad deeds of the previous and work towards fixing what’s been broken or askew. Whether you want to promote education and self-esteem in young kids, give time at a nursing home or just simply wake-up everyday with an open heart and mind. Everyday is a day to do something good.

If you’re stumped for an idea, come to the East River Park at 9am on Saturday, donate to “Pencils for Kids” and workout with a group of equally positive people! You can visit http://www.bbrfitness.com/about.html to get a better look at the trainer and his unique approach to his craft.

Enjoy!

Balance

I lack tact. It’s something I’ve known for a very long while, but it’s a skill I have yet to acquire. This should have been my first hint to the fact that I lack a sort of balance; but maybe the two aren’t really connected. But if I’m not being 100% real, I feel a sort of stirring in my chest. I figure if I’m not able to tell you straight out what I think or feel, then I might as well say nothing at all. And that isn’t totally a bad thing, but it gives light to the way I view a lot of things. To me everything is “black and white” in a sense; and this has proven to be an issue with how temperamental feelings can be. I either hold back to the point of stagnation or jump in head first with every bit of me. I have yet to fully wrap my head around the concept that life is a whole lot of grey. We have to find the shades that make our own the perfect piece.

Balance is the key. This comes down to romance, work, passion, hobbies, planning, spontaneity etc. We are human. We all choose our vices. We all choose our virtues. Some may be easier to get rid of or attain, respectively. We are raised to be, act and think a certain way. We are prone to negative thoughts and actions and we are each born with certain capabilities. We feel and react to anger and pain and whenever we feel any emotion within that spectrum we must decide to choose happiness and love. And though this is simplified, I just want to harp on how important it is that we are conscious of our thoughts and actions. It is easy to dwell in negativity as an underlying current. As humans, we are negative by nature and a string of negative thought may not even seem as such with the glorification of degradation instead of promotion of empowerment. (But that is another post).

This post is an “exercise,” on balance in a sense. You first have to know who you are. If you’re used to always planning, change something in your routine. Do something spontaneous. Do something you’d never thought you would do. Face a fear.  If you’re flying by the seat of your pants, develop a routine that is beneficial to your well-being. If you eat too much meat, add more vegetables to your diet. Be active. Read. Because life is about making things better. It’s being healthier, happier, stronger, smarter. It’s about finding peace within the madnessand finding the balance within your own groove.

Evolution!

I fully believe that keeping a positive outlook will help manifest positivity within your life. But things change in our life situations daily that are not under our control (especially due to the variable of other people). I used to shun change because of the feeling of powerlessness to change.  But I realize that I must embrace change to get where I’m trying to go. Logically, if I want to go anywhere there must be change. So I’ve come to terms with its inevitablity and realized that with the goals I’ve set, how I deal with change is what will reveal my true character and it’s strength, which will ultimately determine my success.

A recent conversation with a friend brought about thoughts on value of self, the value of our work and the opportunities we are given to grow. With trying to attain something he’s wanted for such a long time, he faced an opportunity to “get his foot in the door.” It was a starting point to work in his field, within a different industry. However, the terms that were given for his contract made him question as to whether taking this opportunity was bending to the point where he was devaluing his work and how far he has come and grown with his talent. This was another lesson on change for me.

We have to constantly be aware of how far we have come and of our current situation in order to further our vision and path.  Though situations and relationships, just as we tend to change over time, it is very important that we always choose to EVOLVE.  To evolve is to change for the better.  It is to grow more powerful in our own right with experience and time, along with consistent, conscious, positive thought. Yes, we me must adjust and bend at times to attain what it is we want, but we must always be forward-thinking. We must evolve and build upon that knowledge of how we’ve evolved within change. We must be conscious of how far we bend and compromise so as not to break or destroy any part of the foundation we have already built. We must remember that our self-image, self-worth and values are our foundation. And that though change is inevitable, we can only evolve if we make a conscious decision as to how we change. We must build on the groundwork we’ve planted all our lives. If today is the first day you lay a brick, it’s a starting point. Move forward from here. Evolve.

Faith

It is said that as humans, we are negative by nature. I only just realized I was not as positive of a person as I thought I was because nine out of ten times you will see me with a smile on my face, and nine out of ten times I will be the one to encourage you in whatever endeavour you are pursuing. But when it came to my own pursuits, I used to worry about what the outcome would be and would think of this as being “realistic,” because I would think of all of the outcomes of a situation, good and bad. I didn’t realize that this didn’t allow me to set higher goals, and that this was in fact subconsciously deterring me from whole-heartedly pursuing anything. Every test, every event of significance, every relationship, would be analyzed to the point of stress. And if I actually set a goal, I would stress about when I would get what it is I was trying to achieve. Depending in my emotional investment in the event, I would sometimes even lose sleep over it.

Obviously, that is no way to live. So, I’ve been building on my positive outlook. This has not been easy, as I do live in the land of cynics. I was even proud of being a cynic. And not to further enforce the stereotype of the “typical New Yorker,” but I LOVE cynicism! But in building, I’ve realized that there is a thin line between cynicism and negativity. Some may even say there are no differences between the two. So I teeter with my love of this type of comedy and climbing out of the abyss of a negative mind.

Everyday I interact with people who complain and worry about EVERYTHING and ANYTHING. This environment makes it difficult to keep a complete positive outlook. So many people walk around jaded by their own experience, whether it be envy, resentment, anger, selfishness, mistrust, etc. It’s with this knowledge and forcing myself to be conscious of how I approach certain situations that I have recently gotten to a place where I felt as though I didn’t feel a thing. Worry wasn’t my underlying feeling from day-to-day. I felt that anything that I wanted would come to fruition. And it was in this feeling of certainty that I truly understood what having Faith was. I used to think that Faith was just a mindset, but it is actually a state of being within your mind, heart and soul. And the soul is at a place where, if it’s grounded enough in Faith, it cannot be shaken by any negativity. I have gotten to a point where I truly believe that I will not only attain all that I need, but all that it is I want. And it is with this state of being that I move forward.

There are of course other things that I’ve been working on achieving with this new mindset, but continuing with unwavering Faith and the determination to spreading positivity and Love is the highest goal. This is the underlying current. This is the starting point.

Perseverance

Anyone who knows me knows that my biggest issue with writing is finishing.  Poems, stories, songs…any form you can name. Too many times I’ve stop writing and moved onto a different piece.  It is said that the only way to succeed in life is to persevere.  A piece of art is like a piece of life.  Throughout it’s creation there are ups and downs; moments when you’re totally inspired and moments when you have to force the words on the page.  It’s when you hit those low moments that you have to push through and continue writing. If you persevere through those moments, you will create something magnificent.

I love to write.  With the few stories and many poems I’ve finished, not only was it satisfying to write and complete a piece, but it was reworking and editing that gave me fulfillment.  I’ve lost many of them since, due to technological malfunctions (my heart is still a bit broken) and a time after then, I couldn’t write.  But I am a writer.  It’s even gratifying to edit and preview this blog repeatedly until it says just what I want it to say.  I write to produce pieces that I can go back to and re-read and still find Truth in it.  And though I’ve never really stopped writing since I was 8, I can’t say I’ve ever truly pursued it.  Because of this, I haven’t gotten very far with writing.  But I will not let that stop me from my current goal.  I’ve chosen to persevere.  I am a writer.

Regardless of what it is that you want to accomplish, as long as there is passion and Love, it will shine through in the end result in spite of the difficulties you faced throughout.  Maybe you’ve pursued things to this point that are worthy of you, and maybe you haven’t; but it’s never to late to go after what it is that you truly want.  Once you figure out what that is, make the changes needed to accomplish your goals/ dreams.

We live in a world where we are taught to be “realistic” and advised to be practical with choosing what it is that we want in our lives.  There are moments when you may be discouraged.  It is natural.  But you must remember to keep moving.  Sometimes you may have to go back to the beginning and start from the ground up.  Regardless of how often you falter, you must never give up!  Perseverance is the key success!

They say the way you do one thing in life is the way you do everything in life.  So decide…

Give Love

You’ve heard the phrase: What doesn’t kill you make you stronger! But I think many people interpret the phrase: “What doesn’t kill you makes you harder.”  We tend to allow circumstances to change us for the worse and make us bitter instead of giving insight to our own minds and hearts.  Because every situation, whether good or bad, allows us not only to see how people within the world moves, but also allows us to see ourselves clearer and allows us to become better.

This is why I decided on the name “LiberTeeLove.” It is exactly what it sounds like.  I recognized around the time I wrote the song below, that I withheld Love.  I feared Love and decided on “LiberTeeLove” to remind myself to be more open to life.  As I get older I realize there is no merit in withholding Love and positivity.  One of our greatest achievements is our vast capability to Love.  Love is the inspirer of all things and I want to inspire goodness.  I want to be inspired by goodness.  I know people who believe that there isn’t much goodness within the world.  But regardless of the Love that another withholds or the Love I show, I will always be me.  Nothing will change that.  My mother said that I will always find my self in positions where I am not fully appreciated because of this.  She is right.  I am a bit naive in that sense and I’ve been disappointed many times, but I cannot be any other way.  I will always show Love regardless of disappointment within a situation.   And as I’ve gotten older, I’ve come to a sort of peace with that knowledge.

Not everyone thinks in the way I do.  Not everyone Loves the way I do.  Some may think of me as stupid for this.  But to Love is to believe in the Truth of my own makeup.  Through Love I thrive.  I recently told a close friend of mine that it’s a gift and a curse.  His response: “I think it’s more of a gift.”  (LOVE HIM!)  With that phrase he confirmed my belief that the way I Love is where a big portion of my beauty comes from.  He sees that.  And it’s those relationships and moments that inspire me to continue loving and expressing how I feel to those I Love.

With all of that said, I am guilty of hurting and I am guilty of not fully appreciating the Love someone had to give because of my own fear.  But experience has expanded my mind and view.  I am not perfect.  I am human.  It’s easy to get drawn back into a fearful way of thinking and being, which is a big reason why I post.  Not only do I want to inspire others to look into their own hearts and minds, but I also need to remind myself of why I’m here.  “LOVE INSPIRES ALL THINGS, SO INSPIRE LOVE.”  So, I will express what it is I feel until I feel another way.  My heart is big and bold and resilient.  Because even in the face of doubt and pain one should choose to Give Love and acknowledge Love in any way one can.

I really hope you enjoy the song and hope that it inspires you to BE POSITIVE even when you’ve been hurt.  I can’t believe it’s been five years since I wrote it, but I think the words are still powerful and will resonate with some.  Express positivity instead of bitterness.  Love wholly.

Thanks again for all of your support!

Give Love

You did what you could to make me fall
And you did what you could to make me not care at all
But although I was easily deceived
Your lies will not make me cease to believe
That all people aren’t dirty
True no one is clean
And though you hurt my faith in humanity
I will not rip off my sleeves
I will give love
I will give love
Cause my heart was made to last
My heart can never forget the past
‘Cause I grow stronger with all that I achieve
So in spite of you I will not rip off my sleeves
I must admit for a while I was broken
Wondering if there was any point in hoping
And though sometimes I do recede
I know life happens to everyone and so I believe
I will give love
I will give love
You did shake me
But you won’t break me
‘Cause my heart was made to last
And so what my heart can never forget the past
‘Cause I grow stronger with all that I achieve
So in spite of you I will not rip off my sleeves
I will give love
I will give love
I will give love
I will give love
You did shake me
But you won’t no you can’t break me

Standards

We all have them even if we don’t know it.  We know our standards of living by how we feel once these standards are not met.  A standard is said to be “an acknowledged measure of comparison for quantitative or qualitative value; a criterion; a degree or level of requirement, excellence, or attainment; a requirement of moral conduct; a pedestal, stand, or base.”  In short, it is the basis of how we live our lives.  As you know, I’ve been trying to push positivity down everyone’s psyche with every single post that I write.  And if you haven’t gotten my message in any of the past posts, Happiness is THE standard of living (or at least it’s mine and I think it should be everyone’s number one criterion).  We must decide to make the choices within our life which support that standard of living.

I had a friend mention… in a fashion, the difference between preferences and standards and that many people mistake having preferences and having standards.  And it got me to think as to think of what a standard really is.  A standard can be a preference, however a preference is merely a choice that is made; “the selecting of someone or something over another or others.”  It is not necessarily based on any profound decision-making.  I think my father explained it best when he said “a standard is how you expect to be treated.”  It’s also how you treat people.  If how you’re being treated by someone makes you unhappy, that person does not live up to your standard of living.  As I said, you must keep people in your life who keep you in a positive space and can encourage you when you’re not.  We must continually elevate one another in order to sustain our own happiness.

Now with that said, we must look for our own standards, within our own mind and spirit.  Happiness is a way of life, and the right choices have to be made to nourish it.  So, we must always be honest with ourselves.  We must decide what it is that truly makes us happy and not base it on false representations of happiness.  Though we do gain happiness from material things and moments of pleasure, we are comprised of more than what is seen on the surface to sustain those moments of happiness.

I don’t know what it is that truly makes you happy.  That’s something you have to figure out yourself.  And as I sit here and go over my own list in my head, I wonder how it is that we develop these standards.  Everyone lives differently and defines happiness differently.  And it is by living everyday that we can really pinpoint what it is that makes us happy individually.   There is no right or wrong, unless you in turn cause unhappiness in another for the sake of your own enjoyment or benefit (wrong, wrong, wrong).  Happiness is a state of mind and a way of life.  And no one’s happiness should ever be compromised.

So, after you finish reading this:

  1. Set your standards.
  2. Find your happiness.
  3. Live life.
  4. Repeat.

Spring Forward

It’s been a couple weeks since we’ve “sprung forward,” and though the cold is still nipping at our heels, Spring is here and we are slowly feeling her presence in New York City.  The sun is still shining when I leave work in the evening and when I wake up in the morning the birds are still chirping, regardless of the 25 degree weather and the snow on the grown.  And though it may sounds cheesy, I can’t help but compare this change of season to my current spiritual growth and consciousness.

As a lot of you may know, I’ve been working on changing the way I think.  I used to think of myself as a positive person, but I would worry about the outcome of everything, thinking of the good and bad outcomes.  I thought of that as being practical and realistic because…life happens!  But in thinking this way, I never realized that I was actually reinforcing any negative outcome by simply putting thought into it.  And though I didn’t outright tell myself that I couldn’t do something, I’m sure that subconsciously I discouraged myself from taking risks and working whole-heartedly towards any dream I had ever conjured.   Now I emphasize on the positivity within any situation.  In keeping my thoughts positive, dreams that were once unreachable are now acquirable goals and aspirations.

Now with my focus on thinking positive I’ve also been more conscious of the energy around me.  I try my best to encourage those around me to focus on the positivity of the moment and even more so, to not dwell on negativity.  It’s so easy to get caught up on the hectic morning commute or on how far away you are from a goal that we forget to be thankful that we made it safely to our destination, or how far we’ve come on our path towards our goal.

Life moves in seasons and we have to go through the cold of winter to get to the buds of spring.  We go through droughts and floods, from cold and stagnant moments to times where things are so “hot” we forget to see our blessings in the grind.  Take a moment everyday to think of all of the blessings you received the previously.  Be conscious of the fact that even though you’re still working towards a dream, you’re so much further than you were.  Be thankful for your talents and ambition!  Encourage those around you to be positive and for those who are hell-bent on being caught up in negativity, I say “SPRING CLEANING!”

The energy that surrounds you is where you will dwell.  If you find that there are people in your life who do nothing for your spirit, mind or heart, there is no need to make a point to spend your energy on them.  The energy of the people you spend the most time with and those who you speak with on a regular basis are who you are and it is critical to your life’s path.  Decide where you want to be and SPRING FORWARD into creating that world for yourself!

In trying to be consistent with this blog, I grow weary of redundancy.  But I can’t help but dwell with my furthering consciousness of the energy within and without.   At times we lose sight of who finds their way in our circle especially with social networking.  But this also allows me to observe that even the most successful and seemingly confident people are drawn into negative ways of thinking and boost themselves up by putting others down.  The grass is always greener on the other side, but it probably isn’t easy even when you’re on top.  But in your journey, don’t forget where you where you’ve been.  As your life blossoms, give life to all of those around you.  Being consistently positive–that’s as forward-thinking as one can get.  Be the inspiration and motivation.

Perception

I’ve always been fascinated with this concept. (You probably realized this from the title of this blog). There is the saying that there are always three sides to a story; side A, side B and the Truth. But perception stretches far, wide and deep. With ongoing self-discovery my own view of myself changes. It is the most important feeling or thought that one can have. How do you view yorself? Once you discover this you will then have to decide how you will make your mark in the world…if any.

My father is half black, half Chinese. My mother is a mixture of Dutch, Black, “Amerindian,” and who knows what else. My hair is natural. I have pigment to my skin. I am woman. The world views me as a black woman. I will always be who I am in essense, regardless of how I am viewed by someone else. I will be who I am regardless of how I am viewed by myself (which is all that ultimately matters in my world, being a Leo..so they say). My life and my life’s view is my own.

I think I’m slowly but surely internalizing that concept.  My words, my thoughts, my feelings are all my own, and are all under my control. My world is created by my perception of the world around me and my perception of my place in the world. But with that said, and although I’ve always been fascinated by the concept of perception, it was with recent conversations with a few friends of many years that I realized that even in my closest relationships and my daily routine, perception plays such a big role because of the perception of each interaction. I guess this is why so many people are concerned with their image; and I wonder if I have been hurting myself by putting less emphasis on how I am viewed by others and more in how I’m viewed by myself. Now, don’t let this statement confuse you in thinking I am not concerned about the views of others. I am! But in my daily interactions I am more concerned with the moment and not what I want the moment to be or mean, so I tend to miss how the other person may interpret the moment, in the moment.  I guess you can say I can’t see the forest for the trees.

With all of this said, my perception is ever-changing and I think for the better. I am starting to put more emphasis on thinking that things will work out for the best and that I am what I think.  I’m working on being more conscious and more hopeful that what I interpret the moment to mean is equally felt and thought by all participants.  Especially since my world is a manifestation of what my mind produces and I am doing my best to think in Love and think Positive.  I’m working on focusing on the energy that surrounds me because although I have my own mind and my own thoughts, what I surround myself with is what I will become.  I’m working on emitting positivity in everyday life, because we do not live in a perfect world.  So whatever I put into the world matters (with all of the negative we are being fed by media, subliminally and overtly).  I do this because I hope that my perception will have an affect on the universe in some way.  Positivity and Love;  that is all I want to create.

Love

With all of the people I’ve met in my life, I thank God for all of the ones who stayed.  Regardless of how often you see someone, if you feel the same way you felt the from the first time you met them, IT IS REAL!  I think I’ve just now decided that they are the ones who will stay forever.  Our perception changes daily with everyday life, but you will never be able to replicate that feeling.  The genuine joy of seeing someone and speaking with someone regardless of how much time has passed between the last time you saw them to now.  A month, a year, 5 years– Love is Love.  This is how we find balance.  It is easy to get caught up in everyday life.  It is easy to gey lost in the grind–get lost in a dream–get lost in the chaos.  But where is the Love that grounds us?  Where is our core?  You feel it once you share you’re deep desires.  You feel it in the eyes of your friend who has all of the doubts about their life that you have about yours, yet believes that you will find all that you desire as easily as you breathe.  A lot of times they believe in you more than they believe on themselves.  But that is True Friendship–True Love.  When we are at our lowest, it is through the eyes of our loved ones that we find the support needed to build ourselves up.

A friend told me that once the right people are in our lives, everything just falls into place.  And I believe that.  The energy that surrounds us makes our world and propels us to where we want and need to be.  Look at your life.  See who it is that’s been there throughout.  Cherish them.  Let them know how you feel, because it might just be what they need to acheive all that it is they dream of.