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Courage

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As stated many times before, there are many things that I want to accomplish. I actually just finished a in-depth conversation with a very close friend about one of these goals and the effort I have been putting in. In turn, I also stated that so many people I know don’t seem to put effort into anything and seem to be getting by. “It’s not fair” came out of my mouth a few times. To say the least, the past few months have not been easy. But this makes me realize, that nothing is going to seem “fair” during the journey. A lot of times it has been hard for me to believe that I can continue believing in having something more. So in these trying times, I started listening to a lot of motivational speeches. My favorite being “The Strangest Secret,” narrated by Earl Nightingale. One nugget he states is “success is the progressive realization of a worthy ideal. If a man is working towards a predetermined goal, he is a success. If he is not doing that, he is a failure.” He also states, “the opposite of courage in our society is not cowardice, it is conformity.” So in the face of hardship, I must remember, “I am a success because I am courageous.”

What we receive is directly in proportionate to what we get. And I post all of these positive things, but once things get discouraging, I have to check myself. Changing a way of thinking and being is hard, especially when all around, things try to convince you to take the easy route and stay the same. I was going to name this post “Effort,” but realized that effort equals to the Courage we must have to make this effort. It takes a lot of courage to believe in anything, much less think that things can be different from what it is you see and know. A lot of times it’s the ones we love or look up to that tell us that these things are not achievable. Think of a child who believe in Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny and their reaction once they realize that what they believed in wasn’t real. Think of believing in a Love and the feeling of realizing that the Love you thought was real was an apparition. Think of working on a project that you believe in for months or years and then being rejected over and over again by the powers that be. It can be devastating. It takes courage to go all in and put that effort in to wholeheartedly believe.

So many of us want things but lack the vision and motivation. We don’t know HOW we will get somewhere, so somewhere in our mind, back in our subconscious there are little voices that discourages ACTION. They discourage you from taking the first step and to follow through with all of the steps that follow. These little voices give excuses. Maybe they tell you flat out that you won’t be able to get what you want. Maybe they say you should wait until the “right time.” Maybe you worry about what your parents, friends or critics would say, but courage is “the quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, danger, pain, etc., without fear.” William James stated “we need only in cold blood act as if the thing in question were real and it will become infallibly real by growing into such a connection with our life, that it will become real. It will be so in knit with habit and emotion that our interest in it will be those that characterize belief.” William Shakespeare noted “our doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt.” Our courage is in our beliefs. Our courage is in our actions.

Sometimes I think I am naive, but I am idealistic, and I do believe “what give is what you get” (though sometimes this does not seem to be the case). Sometimes you give so much and don’t seem to get what it is that you put into a situation / endeavor. But the key is not to give up. The key is to become stronger and to become more courageous. Your goals will be met, even after successive seeming failures. Many of us give up in the sight of failure which is why it takes courage to “believe and achieve.” It takes courage to face yourself, your worst enemy and your best friend. But once you realize success is a process and a journey, you will be able to face all things that come your way. You will be willing to go down a road and not stop until you reach the end. Many things will be in your path. Many things will tell you you’re doing the wrong thing or that you’re going in the wrong direction and ask how are you going to get all the way down the path of the impossible or unknown. Fix your mind to believe that nothing that will stand in your path will prevent you from achieving your goal. This is the key. Courage.

Remember, the number one naysayers is more than likely, yourself. So set your mind to a goal and gather the courage to see it all the way through. I came across a prime example while going through motivational speeches; a 12 minute video of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s story. He set a goal and against all odds, became a champion. How did he do this? He put in effort daily. He believed in himself so much that he convinced others to believe in him too. Now there is a sports festival named after him.

It takes courage to stand alone. It takes courage to say no to conformity in order to become and achieve something greater. Each of us are all great. We each just have to have the courage to believe that we are.

Know Thyself

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A million apologies to those loyal who read “Words and Perceptions…” and have been waiting for another post. To say the least, this past month has been a wonderfully surprising and filled with all the lovely things that life has to offer. A CHANGE HAS COME! And I give full credit to the power of positivity. Through reflection and pushing past fears to achieve goals set forth, I was able to take steps upward and outward. Though there is still much to do, by acknowledging my power, I was able to move forward towards goals that I set months ago.

So many of us move through life not truly knowing or understanding the power we have within us to achieve tremendous goals and live the life we want. We struggle, but many of us give up before the breakthrough. So we continue living life in a stagnant phase. The greatest thing I could had done for myself was analyzing my past and identifying my strengths, weaknesses and fears. I even went as far as identifying where some of these fears stemmed from. By doing this I was able to convince myself to move forward towards completing what I wanted to achieve, with what I knew about myself. I continually told myself that anything is possible to work through/ to, once I’m 100% honest with my limitations at that specific time. Through being honest with myself, I was able to work past those limitations.

You can be ever-evolving, if you want to be. And it is only through knowing who you are and what you want to be that you can achieve things you probably didn’t think you could a year ago, a month ago or a week ago. You must not listen to naysayers, even if one of those naysayers is you. Know thyself. Know if you are the thing that’s holding you back from being great. Know if you’re the reason you have yet to find true love. Know if you’re the reason you have not been able to make a positive impact in the world.
Knowledge is power. Knowledge of self is the key to vision! Open your eyes and mind to the universe!

“…know thyself … and thou shalt know the gods.”

Reflection

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I am blessed.

I did not need to reflect to come to this conclusion. This is something I’ve always known. But over time, I’ve realized that reflection is needed to grow and appreciate those blessings on another level. Reflection is needed for me to understand myself and become better. These posts have been a way for me to reflect and decide what it is that I really want out of life. Through this consideration, I was able to build a perspective and an energy that has brought wonderful experiences and people into my life and immediate circle. Sometimes it was not easy to look back on my wrongdoings or own-up to my flaws, but I am ever grateful for the strength and love that is within and that has surrounded me. And hope that my gratitude continues to be received well by the universe.

Many times we go through experiences, get hurt and are ready to point the finger. What did the other person do to make the situation end-up the way it did? How did the other person hurt me? Why am I right, and why is the other person wrong? Life is full experiences and lessons. We often look at all of the things we gave, but we must also look at all the things we didn’t give. This is not to put ourselves down, but to look at the entire situation; to see our strengths and weaknesses. Most times we forget to do that. At the end of this reflection, we are able to ask the question “was I fair” and “how can I be better?” Yes, we are able to decide how we will allow others to treat us and learn of traits that we consider undesirable, by solely focusing at the flaws of the other person. But this not all that is needed to grow towards one’s full potential. This alone, creates boundaries. And we must strive to make our world and perspective bigger, not smaller.

It is said that like attracts like. It is said that everything happens for a reason. When you relfect, you are able to see parts of yourself in those people who hurt you. With that said, there is a reason why that person was in your life then and is no longer. There is a reason you went through that experience. Reflect, think of why. And don’t do it with an ounce of pity for yourself in your heart. Look at it with the goal and mindset of “how can this make me better?” Were you shown a part of yourself that you didn’t like? Were you challenged beyond where you are willing to go? People are in our lives because we put them there. Think of why you put this person there. Think of why they are no longer there. Your world is yours alone. Face the challenges head-on. Be better.

I still stumble on my path. But I find comfort in knowing that it is natural and that I am putting my best foot forward in practicing my new life philosophies and in working towards long-term goals. Reflection allows me to see where I’ve made mistakes. I reflect to gain perspective. Reflection allows me to give thanks for all that I have and all that I’ve gained in strength and wisdom. And I continue learning which allows me to take bolder steps and larger leaps of Faith.

It’s all about growth and betterment. Reflect.

Motivation

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On Saturday I went to fitness conference at the Jacob Javits Center. I’m still a bit sore, but it’s good pain. I’m thankful for that. But what I also enjoyed was the lecture that was given on motivation. “How do I get motivated to workout?” This was the question asked, and since I have been pretty consistent and work out on a regular basis as of late, I felt as though I shouldn’t stay and listen. But I stayed…a break in between classes. And the conversation turned into more than, what motivates you to workout. It turned into what motivates you in life. And I enjoyed it thoroughly because it echoed feelings and thoughts I’ve been having and further confirmed that I’m on the right track toward my goals. It inspired me.

Positivity is my lover and I do my best to be ever faithful. Being positive is key to all goals and all upward movement. And it is this frame of mind that draws motivated, inspirational people in my life. I remind myself why my view of life has lifted higher (goals, vision) and how I increased the power within myself. These points are key. You’re level in life is only as high as your vision. And with this vision, I know that all that I want will be acheived with Faith, consistent hard work and PATIENCE (god knows I’m still building on the latter).

So I stay grounded in a renewed and intensified (to an exponential power) love for myself, a love for my life and the people in it, an enthusiastic appreciation for all things good and in a knowing that no other power is greater than my own in my world, because I set the pace.

I SET THE FREQUENCY.

Something that was said in the lecture that relates to all things is, “where you are is where you’re supposed to be, because it is the sum result to all that you’ve done and all that has happened to you, to this point.” This concept was related to health so diet and exercise were the main variables. But this also relates to life. Is your life in tip top shape. Is it the vision you have for yourself? If so, keep doing what you are doing. If not, you can change that. Again, this will take patience, hard work and Faith in yourself to motivate towards your goal and to stay motivated. Whatever you want can be done. You can find a way. You can get there!

Life: Conceptualized, Visualized, Materialized

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Anyone who has been reading can say I’ve been documenting my transformation. This isn’t a physical transformation. It is all mental which makes it pretty abstract. Some of it does show in the way I eat and my efforts to stay consistent with working out (I see the muscles forming), a lot of what I have spoken has yet to put to the test. My view on Life and Love has changed tremendously and today I asked myself, if faced with the emotion of Love or faced with an opportunity to make significant headway on the things I’ve been working on, will I have the courage to take that chance?  Will I still have Faith once Love is staring me in the face, telling me to be vulnerable? Will I have the mind to take my talents to the next level when the opportunity arises? Because that will be the test that shows if I have truly evolved.

Throughout the reemergence of the blog, I’ve conceptualized life with my views on how Life and Love should be approached. And with that, I have realized that truly living takes courage. It’s facing fears. It’s being open. It’s taking chances. It’s trusting something other than yourself. It’s trusting yourself. These can be difficult tasks because of past experiences, past pains, your view on society through the view of society itself, or maybe you were just raised to live cautiously. But once you decide that what you want is more powerful than your fear of the journey to obtain it and see yourself only within that realm of power, you’re living on your own terms and you are able to turn your dreams or goals for your future, into the reality of your present moment.

Again, I come back to consciousness and living in the present.  It comes down to deciding what you want and working on achieving it, daily.  In the most basic analogy: to be fit one must workout and eat well regularly.   There may be cravings for chocolate cake and French fries, but that doesn’t serve the goal towards fitness. Be present in the moment but be conscious of how your decisions affect your progress.

I know I will be faced with the opportunity to attain everything I want.  At that moment I must remember my goal to stay consistent in my vision of Love and I must face the fear of being great and continue to move forward and upward with my goals. I must be patient and never doubt my ability to take on any challenges, whether internally or externally.  I must never lose perspective. I must gain perspecitive.  Everything is a lesson and everyday is a blessing.   And with it comes better knowledge of my own heart and mind and unshakeable Faith and strength.

“Wherever your heart is, that is where you’ll find your treasure.” 

Follow your heart and do not be turned away by fear. The benefits are massive!

Finding Love in Adolescence

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I wrote this a few years ago, observing and imagining what it is to be a teenager and feel Love without fully understanding yourself, much less, understanding what it is to truly love another person. As a teenager/ child, we are bombarded with images of what Love really is. Sometimes even as adults we lack the consciousness to grasp what Love really means and how to give and receive Love. But Life is the best teacher there is. I hope you enjoy!

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She lies in his bed
He rolls over and kisses her
Though he says he’d rather have ambition
He does nothing but try to keep her

He’s blind, and she loves him blindly
Not conscious, so they’re vulnerable to each other’s faults
Defensiveness makes them love anxiously
And progression escapes them because there’s nothing besides the two

They love each other deeply
Together before they even wanted to know of love
Still, they don’t know each other or themselves enough
To show what that means or to build

He says he loves her, but fights to love himself
His life is complicated as other young men he knows
Uneducated, brainwashed to think he can’t be more
So, he’s unable to understand love as a selfless action

Each is incomplete because they’re
Angry at themselves and life
They feel as though they got the clam and not the pearl
No longer wondering of possibility, just pressured

So close, so they can’t see how they fit; that they fit
But he travels deeply, and she’s wide open
He doesn’t see that she really loves him, without understanding
And she can’t see that he uses her to cope, in Love

He doesn’t know where to begin, to survive and provide in this world
And he swears no one understands his difficulties
So he runs the streets
Because he knows she’ll always be faithful

She thinks that her hope is defeated
And her man should be her life’s plan
She sticks because loving him is the only thing she thinks she’s good at
But they still have a long way to understand what it is to love

**************************************************************

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You keep telling me that what I want is too big
You keep telling me that the words won’t come
There’s a stifling grip around my spirit, but still I fix my gaze
It doesn’t matter where I stand at this very moment or what I currently hold in my hand
My mind’s eye is set on site
And my heart’s open
There’s so much that I want
And it is only now that I have the courage to admit it
So I’m learning how to give to receive
I’m learning how to whole-heartedly believe, though things come slowly
Conscious of my hold, so as not to slip with my passionate grip
Because overbearing strength is not always the way
Feminine finesse and faithful patience are still acquiring traits
But as long as my hands can write
And as long and my heart can feel
I will write of love and dreams beyond loss
And I will write life and love into my dreams
Goals set forth, bearings implanted in my character and creativity
Reminding myself to no longer take for granted the queen in me
Still molding myself and my mind
So much more revealed in my constant kneading
And I am better than before
I am smarter than before
I love better than before
And all that I am is the foundation to all that will be

Don’t Worry. Be Happy.

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It seems simple enough, but there are times when happiness is taken from you. Maybe purposefully or maybe by no one’s fault, directly. But once you go through emotional distress you almost feel as though you will not be able to recover the happiness you lost. You try to protect yourself from ever feeling that sort of pain again. But once you do this, you actually prolong the hurt and end up hurting yourself in other ways. If you do not confront the pain or the loss you cannot release it, and you give it more power over your present. You give it power over your future. You give it power over your mind, heart and soul.

I speak as if releasing pain is as easy as 1, 2, 3. I know it is not. It takes time. Some quicker than others, thankfully. Because I am not the most patient woman. But sometimes it takes LOTS of time. I get through it by understanding that the heart does what it does. It cannot be turned off with a switch. The release of a feeling takes time. But what we must do is be sure we keep our mind present. If we dwell on the past or the loss, the hurt is given more power than all of good we presently have in our lives. Boundaries are built stronger and makes it harder for the good to re-enter our hearts and lives. On some days it will be so much harder to push through and we will feel as though we should revert to fear. But we have to keep reminding ourselves that “this too shall pass” and what we want (happiness) will prevail in our lives.

I’ve only JUST realized this and made the decision to refuse to let anything hold me in that negative space for long.  I do not deny my humanity. I feel pain. But it was through facing this pain and working to conquer it with Love, that I learned invaluable lessons. Patience. Faith. Positivity. Most of all, I’ve learned that Love is the core of all things good. So I do my best to infuse Love into everything I do. I’m sure I’ve failed more times than I have succeeded by getting angry, stressed, annoyed and many other negative feelings. But I will not give up on Love. It is the inspirer of all things good.

My trick is an oldie but goodie. Work on building your mind one day at a time. Your mind is the more powerful that you probably allow it to be. But once you change your thoughts, you can change how you feel. You will end up changing the way you do things day to day.

So, be conscious. Find something that you love and do it. Set a goal. Find new things to learn and get into. Workout. Write about what you feel. Sing. Create. Go to the park. Appreciate the little things. Write down what you are grateful for everyday. Read.

Sometimes regaining happiness takes a lot of work. But in time, you’ll get it back, and you’ll be that much stronger for it.

Time is an Illusion!

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I almost feel as though I don’t have to say anything else with this title. TIME IS AN ILLUSION!!! I will elaborate a tad…

We find so many reasons as to why we can’t do something in relation to Time. Our perception of Time is everything, and it can be the biggest hinderance depending on how we look at it. We do not know what time we have in the future. And time lost is usually based on things we think we cannot regain. “I’m too old for that.” “It’s too late for me to start.” “I’ll start tomorrow, next week or next year.” But life is fluid yet steady depending on one’s will. We can obtain anything we wish. It takes patience and Faith. It must be done without perceiving Time as being endless or lost. Time itself is defined as “the indefinite continued progress of existence and events in the past, present, and future regarded as a whole.” Though it can be measured in minutes/ months/ centuries, it is abstract.

There are many things that I want to accomplish. And though there are still times when I move from feeling I have much time to do what it is I want, to being anxious of when I will attain what it is I am working for or anxious of “running out of Time,” I remind myself to be conscious and live in the present. Yes, I have goals and timelines, but I must also be respectful, tolerant and patient with Time. I must realize that “the now” is where everything is formed. And after this moment has passed, it will transform into something else.

We are ever-changing (with any hope/ luck/ work/ sacrifice). And as we change, so does Time, a vision based perception. Remember, TIME IS AN ILLUSION!!

My Favorite F Words

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Sometimes the best lessons are not profound. What is real doesn’t always have to be “discovered.” Many times, what is most real is the constant within our lives. It is the seed planted within a child and the vine of knowledge that is nurtured in his/her growth. It is the subconscious.

Over the weekend I was able to spend time with family members I hadn’t seen in years. But even though it had been so long, the bond is still strong. In speaking with them, I further strengthened revelations I’ve had recently and have come to realize that all the things that seem new to me are things that I’ve been instilled with. To be independent and strong. To have Faith and to Love. To be honest and good. I was taught this at a young age and yet still, these lessons are learned and built upon everyday. We are given a FOUNDATION. Whether it is because we have been deprived of essential needs or given everything we could desire, FAMILY is what makes us. This weekend has brought further pride in my Love for my family. They are brilliant stars within my universe. They were my FRIENDS before I even knew the meaning of what a real friend was. They are the prototypes of all friends I’ve acquired and kept throughout my life. They keep me grounded.

It was simpler back then. Now we are all grown, some with kids and married. But now, we are able to further understand the Love we have for one another. Yes, we’re connected through Facebook and we can call each other on the phone, but nothing is like sitting down and talking face to face about what we’ve been through, what we’re going through and what we see further in our path.

Our childhood is not a discovery. While going after our dream and maintaining stability within ourselves in everyday life, we forget and remember while building and meeting new people. The memories and lessons learned when we are young and impressionable are gems that illuminate our current vision of the type of mother/ father/ friend/ lover we will be. It is the foundation to all things that is and will be. And sometimes we must revisit these times and these bonds to strengthen and marvel at what has been built.