Challenges

“Almost every adult is, in a greater or lesser degree, still struggling on the long journey to achieve selfhood on the basis of patterns which are set in his early experiences…” – Rollo May

One of the first challenges we face, and continue to face throughout our lives, is the battle between our ego and superego. The ego is “the part of the mind that mediates between the conscious and the unconscious and is responsible for reality testing and a sense of personal identity.” The superego is “only partly conscious, represents internalization of parental conscience and the rules of society, and functions to reward and punish through a system of moral attitudes, conscience, and a sense of guilt.” If we are working to be better, we have to unlearn as much as we have to learn, because there are things that bound us and things that allow us to live the lives we intend. It is true, “we are who we are,” but there are also things that we want to achieve and acquire on levels of consciousness, spirituality, physicality and materially, that we do not have from birth. These things are only acquired by overcoming challenges, great and small.

What is your definition of a challenge? How often do you think of the word and what it means in your everyday life? I ask this, because although I have faced challenges, I never realized that a challenge is the pathway to a goal (even when I started forming and working on my goals). Challenges are a part of every single day, consciously and subconsciously, big and small, overtly and in the subtexts of our lives. I realized that not seeing something as a challenge was a disservice to my growth. I never thought of being better as a challenge, per se. I just knew I wanted to be better or to acquire something. But in understanding the role of challenges in my life and betterment, I have gained more focus and a different perception. I realize that challenge doesn’t mean “hard.” A challenge is something worthwhile and achievable.

In trying to create a life we feel is up to our individual standards, we are faced with every possible distraction to veer us away from simply envisioning what we want our lives to be. And without vision, we cannot see the paths or steps to acquiring that life and are not able to consciously work towards that life. To get there, we must propose challenges upon ourselves, goals. And along the way, we will undoubtedly be faced with unexpected challenges. Either way, rising to a challenge, is the only way to get better. And we must work to move past being COMFORTABLE in order to learn and grow and acquire what it is we want to get.

A great analogy to challenges and life is Arnold Schwarzenegger’s comment in, “Pumping Iron,” the documentary. I felt I had to mention this, no matter how long winded this post may seem, because it struck me to my core. It made so much sense and put things in perspective with challenges that I was facing at the time. He stated, more or less, that it’s only by working past the pain barrier that the targeted muscle grows. You have to push and do those few reps after you start to feel the burn. That’s the only way you will see results and gains, with the challenges of life (and the challenges of lifting). Try thinking of it on those terms. You are the muscle, and it’s your mind and your will that get you through, helps you grow. That pain barrier is the crux to being better, stronger, a better defined individual.

Now that may seem grim. The only way we can experience joy is through pain. But I believe life was meant to be full of things that push and pull at our core, and force us to really see what we are made of. That which broadens your mind and your will is that which sustains and stretches our abilities as an individual and as a human being. Remember, life was not meant to be easy, but it was meant to be joyous and fulfilling. We have to continually push through that pain barrier to get to our desired destination.

Another thing to think about are all of the things that come in your path in a single day that distract you past the need and want for challenges? They can be surface or things that run deep. Are you fully aware of those everyday things?

Write down a goal you’re trying to achieve (in your phone, on a sticky note paper, wherever), whether long-term or short-term. As the day goes on, write down all the things, within that day, that keep you from achieving that goal. Example, a goal of mine is to be able to do a set of unassisted pull-ups by the end of the year. Something that keeps me from being able to do that currently is obviously my upper body strength. Before, it was also me accepting that I didn’t have enough upper-body strength, accepting my weakness, it was Netflix, Instagram, friends, laziness, lack of determination….etc. But what I’m trying to point out with this simple example, is that no matter how simplistic the challenge may be, there are many parts to the challenge which strengthen intangible things as well as those that can be seen with the plain eye (such as becoming more disciplined and confident with my workout regimen and having a more defined body, respectively).

I enjoy comfort immensely. I enjoy pleasure and luxury and being lazy. But I also enjoy the rewards of a challenge. I like the way my teres major feels the day after working on my pull-ups. In working through self imposed challenges, I feel better about myself because I’ve accomplished my set goal. In working past challenging times, I become a better person by learning different aspects of myself that weren’t previously revealed to me. All in all, challenges make me look at the world in a different way. I look at myself in a different way. I’ve realized that I am even more flawed than I knew and in turn, this makes me a bit more conscious and a bit more compassionate towards myself. I am more grounded as an individual, which allows me to challenge myself in different ways and work to be more compassionate with others.

Remember, challenges are the hoe to your garden. Once you till the foundation, you’re able to plant seeds for your future. You will be able to give more to yourself and others because you will feel and think more abundantly. I’m saying this through experience. The key is to this mindset is compassion and consciousness. Conscious change is a challenge that we struggle through, working past the comfort zone. But seeing and feeling the difference makes it all worth it. Recognizing even a slight bit more as to where energies were spent, is spent and should be spent allows further growth. When I take a look at myself on my journey with compassion, I am able to look at it a bit more objectively. I feel more virtuous and my esteem for myself and others are magnified.

“We must rediscover the sources of strength and integrity within ourselves.” -Rollo May

* Definitions were acquired from http://www.thefreedictionary.com.